Ye Old blog

 

An Interview with Ambroise Paré

 

During the mid 16th century, Ambroise Paré worked as a french surgeon in Europe. He went on to change the face of modern-surgery when he began to sow wounds shut during amputations, rather that cauterize them. A medical legend, he plans to retire in the year 1590, which, without the surgeon, might become a very grave year.

 

I: Thank you for joining me today.

 

AP: De rien! Je suis content… I mean, I am happy to be here.

 

I: Haha! Anyways, I would like to start off by asking what surgery is like. How painful is it?

 

AP: Ah, oui. Surgery, as you know, is very painful, and I wish that a doctor would find a medication to dull the experience! Before an amputation we usually have the patient drink lots of wine.

 

I: A doctor? Don’t you mean a surgeon should find a pain-dulling medication?

 

AP: Of course not! If I created a new medication I would lose my job! Surgeons are prohibited from performing doctoral duties like prescribing medication, and curing the ill! Yes, surgeons and doctors perform in different fields.

 

I: Oh, silly me I forgot. Even though you are not a doctor, can you describe some of the medicines that are commonly used?

 

AP: Bien sûr! On the common physician's shelf you obviously find crushed armadillo bone, to cure deafness, some dead mice, for warts, and everyday garden herbs! They have not been proven very successful, but medicine is not an exact science, rather it is experimental.

 

I: There is a terrible illness spread around right now, can you tell me about the black death?

 

AP: Quel Horreur! The Bubonic Plague outbreaks began in China around 1330, and spread to England, where it has only gotten worse! In about five years, twenty million people had perished! Nicknamed the black death because of the black spots appearing on the victims, the symptoms include fever, chills enlarged lymph nodes, and weakness. The other day, a soothsayer told me that in the twenty first century, small traces of the plague will be found in farm animals living in southwestern America, a future country. Also, very rare cases of the plague will appear, mainly in African countries. The black death may never leave us!

 

I: Very sad, very sad. And how are patients with mental illnesses treated?

 

AP: You mean demon possession? Oui, we send them to the nearest church, and have a priest cleanse them of their sins. It has not proved to be very effective though…

 

I: Thank you for joining us today Monsieur Pasé!

 

AP: Au revior!